A fresh word... I have been asking God for a fresh word from Him for the last week or so. If more than a day or so goes by and I have not felt the almighty presence of our God directly in my life I get anxious. Where are you God? Have you forgotten me? I need you Lord.... I need to know you are with me at all times...
Adoption is a scary thing. There are SO many unknowns. Many, many people are involved and with countless variables it is impossible to control any part of the process. For someone who is used to being in control of EVERYTHING it can be difficult and terrifying to let go. Putting your life and your future all in so many different hands can be frightening.
I am sure God is doing a great work in me through this process. I am sure one of the lessons to be learned is to LET GO and let God. I am sure I absolutely FAIL at this every single day. It's not easy for my type A personality.... I think God is literally having to pry my white knuckled grip one finger at a time away from holding on so tightly to control in my life. He's gently reminding me day by day He is in control, not me. Sometimes though, as I have to let that control slip from my grip I lose my compass of God's presence. He feels distant at times.
Of course I know in my head He is near. The word tells us again and again He will never leave us or forsake us. We are His children. We are his sheep and he is our loving shepherd. If even one strays He will leave the entire flock and trail after just that one. Each one of us is that IMPORTANT to Him. My heart just forgets sometimes. When the days are long and life really beats up on me I tend to miss Him. I overlook Him in the ugliness life can bring. I wonder how God can possibly use some of the painful, anguish filled days our adoption journey has brought our way.
He does. He always does. He uses ALL things together for His good. I know this truth. My heart just needs to be reminded from time to time. This last week has seemed one of those distant times. I have been asking God for a fresh word, a new work to just let me know He is near.
Today I got my word! My evening study reminded me He is with us, within us, all around us. He is continually at work in our lives. When our awareness of God grows dim, His presence still continues to shine brightly upon us. Praying with perseverance can accomplish awesome things! I came across the parable in Matthew of the persistent widow who refused to give up! She kept bringing her requests to a judge who neither feared God nor cared about men. Eventually, her persistence wore him down and he granted her wishes. Oh friend, how much more does our God respond when we cry out to our Father!! He is just waiting to hear our prayers if we just pray fervently in His holy name.
I wanted to share my devotional take home message for today since we are a group of waiting hopefuls. I hope you will receive as much joy from it as I did! "Though you may have to wait a long time, do not give up. For everyone who asks and keeps on asking receives; he who seeks and keeps on seeking finds."
How about you? Do you ever find that you just need a fresh word to rejuvenate your soul? A fresh word from God can renew our spirits and lift our countenance to endure another day! I hope you receive your fresh word today.
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