Why haven't I been trusted with a child?

I did not think Mother's Day would have much of an effect on me.  I expected to do as we always do.  We spend time with our families and friends and celebrate moms!  It's always been a wonderful time.  I have adoption friends and friends who struggle with infertility.  I had heard them say Mother's Day is a hard day and were not looking forward to it for certain reasons.  They said it hurts.  They said they feel lonely and sad.  I understood for them, but not me...  I was certain I would be fine.

I had been asking myself in the days leading up to Sunday if Mother's Day would hurt this year.  Would I be sad?  Would it be anything but normal?  Would not being a mom hurt even more on Sunday?  I kept coming up with no.  You don't let stuff like that get to you.  It's not about you.  You will be fine.  Mother's Day is for moms.  You aren't a mom.  It's not even about you.  Just focus on the things you need to get done for others.  I was settled with that answer.  I was good with it.  I had no issue with Mother's Day.  I was good to go.  Until Mother's Day eve....